this is nice

I don't really know if anyone actually reads this site. I honestly don't care so much...its nice to be able to just talk....say how I feel.

Currently..I am lost in life. I can't get a job anywhere. its so hard out there. my resume is a good resume. but i lack in certain departments which i guess is part of why i can't get a job. like I don't know excel for anything...most admin jobs require knowing that...but the thing is...I DON'T WANT TO WORK IN ADMIN/OFFICE/CORPORATE CRAP!!!! I just want to have a job that is fun to go to, that pays my bills and keeps me happy. I wish someone would just hire me to be a personal assistant or something. just something.

life is hard right now. I miss my dad. I wish he was here to help me figure out all this shit. I turned to him for advice on everything in my life. now I feel lost and unsure and insecure and just fucking lost.

lifa was enver this hard with all these decisions to be made and problems to be solved...im not saying that my life was easy, cuz if I actually thought about my life I would think it has been hard as can be to live...but I am happy for every day I get, living healthy and happy and strong.

i feel like we made a mistake moving back...we should have stuck it out one more year. but my dad died and I wanted to be with my friends and family. I wants to be close with them. it was the right decision at the time, but now its different....ok so I am totally NOT the shoulda coulda woulda kind of girl.it WAS the right thing to do at the time. now we just need something different.

i hope something positive comes to us quickly...WE NEED something happy and exciting. I need a break from here already...we;ve barely been back 6 months...we are so fucking broke and its so stressful...i hate how much we all need money in order to survive in order to live....in order to be happy.

I recite the serenity prayer all the time...you have to in such craziness.

GOD, grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, the courage to change the things I can, and the wisdom to know the difference.

ONE DAY AT A TIME> how I live my life.

peace out to all my non readers...I'll be back soon

xoox

~@